Gaining

I gotta agree, I would never marry someone if they weren't fully aware of everything about me, including my fetishes, it would be terribly unfair on her to live with you and sense a disappointment but not know what she has done wrong...

Given the history u've described, she'll probably balloon mid to late 20's, but if shes been thin all her life this may result in extreme dieting and exercise on her part.

Talk to her about it, if you can't build a relationship on honesty, it will not last.

Theres always hope.... The real question is how realistic is it that she will gain.

So thunder_thighs, just to make sure I understand you, its not ok to love someone who is not everything you want? And he should leave his current fiancee that he loves, and marry a fat girl just cause she is fat?

The fact that he is marrying says he cares a lot about her. I didn't pick up on him saying that she HAS to gain weight. He was just curious if she ever would.

I have never understood why some people want to start a riot over a simple question. Its not the worlds greatest thing to say, but its not enough of a reason to lambaste someone.

I feel like a broken record, but I will keep saying it over and over again: not all fat people are fat due to bad eating habits.

To the OP, a couple of questions:

1. As another mom-type, I'm with UpsandDowns. What's the rush to get married? I dated my husband for 7 years, on and off, before we got married. We've been married for 24 years, and it's still challenging. Don't rush.

2. Have you discussed your feelings about fat with her? Do you know hers?

3. If she never gained a pound, would you be happy with her for the rest of your life?

I think they'd all be worth asking yourself before you proceed. Whatever you decide, I hope it works out wonderfully and that you're very happy.

It might depend. If you live in a particular place and even there only know a specific subgroup of the society, it's easier than you think to generalize and think everyone else has similar interests, principles and way of life. I've met (in Eastern Europe) 15 year old girls who are much more mature than many spoiled American girls in their late 20's. Not that I wanted to offend anyone, I'm sure there are exceptions, this was just a general observation.

I agree with the others. There is absoletely no reason to get married. She will probably stay thin until you two divorce. Then she will gain 100 pounds, and you'll wish you had her, but she will be gone.

It will happen eventually. Get married, have a baby, she might gain then and then it may cause her metabolism to slow, that would open the door for more weight gain.

No shortage, true, but he did not fall in love with those girls, he fell in love with a girl, and truth can sometimes be relative...........And you groom to be, my advice, PLEASE know what is important for you to have in a relationship before getting married to anyone. Also, though it has been assumed you want your future wife to gain weight, it sounds like that may not be what you want, like your hoping her ginetics do not kick in. If I am wrong I apologize, I'm cloudy from my Allegra.

Hi, How has this all turned out!